About a year ago, while reflecting on my summer at Camp Highland, my devotions led me to John 13, when Jesus washed the feet of His disciples. When He came to Peter, the headstrong disciple refused to be served by his Master, insisting that he should be serving his Lord instead. Once Jesus explained the purpose of His service to His disciples, Peter immediately repented and asked that Jesus clean him completely, not only his feet. As I thought on this, God directed me to realize that I am often like Peter in the way I seek to serve and not be served.
Moses was similarly disillusioned. Though referred to as the most humble man on the face of the earth (Numbers 12:3), Moses showed arrogance just as Peter did and just as I do so often. When he witnessed one of his Hebrew brethren being beaten by an Egyptian, Moses killed the Egyptian to protect his fellow Israelite (Exodus 2:11-12). Moses judged the Egyptian for his sin, and in an attempt to take the place of God, he dealt out what he imagined was justice. Again, when he struck the rock in anger to bring forth water in the desert, Moses strayed from the command of the Lord and spoke as if he himself were producing the water for the Israelites (Number 20:10-12). Twice, the most humble man on earth tried to issue judgment in place of God.
To this man, God chose to show Himself and reveal His Name. In order to remind Moses that there is only one true God, and it is not him, the Lord called Moses to an impossible task and walked with him to bring success. The Lord also shared His name with Moses: I AM THAT I AM. Louie Giglio writes that this revelation of who God is is also a reminder of who we are, or rather, of who we are not. If God's name is "I AM," then our name must be "I am not" (I am not, but I know I AM, Giglio). This was meant to free Moses from the burden of being the savior of his people. No man should have to bear that burden. Only Jesus Christ, the Son of God, was able to carry His identity as God and His purpose as the Savior of humanity with complete humility.
Now, Jesus came to serve, not to be served. That purpose was meant for Jesus alone. Just as God's name "I AM" points out that our name is "I am not," my name, Michael, means "who is like God," which reminds me that there is no one like God who is without need. Though I try to serve everyone in every way as often as I can, it is not my place to refuse service from others. By doing so, I claim to be all-sufficient, just as Moses claimed God's judgment seat. I've found that I've been repeatedly putting myself in the place of God, whether by refusing to receive service or by ignoring advice because I believe I already possess the necessary wisdom, which Romans 12:16 so clearly warns against.
Names often create a platform from which to praise God. Michael is a reminder that the Lord is incomparably great. Hanani is a reminder of God's grace toward us. But similarly, names also serve to convict us when we forget our identities in relation to the Lord. When I believe I am self-sufficient, Hanani reminds me that all I have is because of God's grace, by which He has given me all I need. When I believe I am like God, Michael reminds me that "I am not," and that none can compare to Him. Anything in me that reflects God is only because Christ dwells in me.
To combat my pride, like Moses, I need to remember that the Lord is I AM, and my name is "I am not." Knowing that "I don't have what they need" sets me free to serve joyfully, and knowing that I don't have what I need allows me to humbly receive service rather than refuse it.
Sunday, August 2, 2015
Thursday, July 10, 2014
Do it again!
Back in the winter I was reading a book called Orthodoxy, by G.K. Chesterton. As you might guess from the title, it took a slow start at the beginning, opening with some dry, complex thoughts. But eventually the material started to pick up momentum as the ideas communicated began to generate excitement and motivation to reform. I don't have the book on hand, but what is probably my favorite revelation from Mr. Chesterton's journey to rediscover orthodoxy in his faith was this: Repetition is not necessarily stagnation. This has been a recurring lesson to me for years now, and it seems like I keep coming back to it because it never quite gets all the way through to me.
Chesterton illustrates this idea in this way: Adults and older youth often grow bored with activities quickly. There must always be a sense of novelty in order for a thing to be of interest. There must always be a sense of forward motion. An infant or young child, on the other hand, will often say, "Do it again!" whenever he finds a phenomenon entertaining, and he will not cease to repeat the phrase until he is sufficiently satisfied.
Take, for example, a circle and a spiral as another analogy. In education, we refer to what is called "spiral curriculum," in which one will return to familiar material in order to address new levels of the subject. For example, one may learn that multiplication is like adding multiple times (2x4 is like 2+2+2+2), then later return to learn the multiplication tables, then later return to learn how to multiply multi-digit factors, then later return to introduce variables as possible factors and products. In education, we see the spiral as the model for progress. So what about the circle then? Would that be a symbol of stagnation? What if we took the circle and changed our perspective so that it became not a two-dimensional geometric shape, but a wheel. It is a wheel, not a spiral, that allows a vehicle to move forward. The one who is content to remain in the same place relative to the body for an extended period of time, will find that he has made significant progress for himself and for the whole body, though he remains attached to the same axle.
Time and time again God has brought me back to this idea of sitting at His feet and resting in the truth, waiting for His teachings on a particular subject to sink in before moving on to anything new. But I can never sit still. Metaphorically. I always have to get up and move around. I have to be constantly learning something new, or else I feel like I'm not progressing. I can't just be content to hear the same thing taught to me over and over again until it gets through to me... because I often feel like I already know what He's trying to tell me. I've heard it all before. Or so I think. And I don't hear Him through.
Chesterton idealizes the image of a child laughing and urging his entertainer to "do it again" by putting the lens up against the Creation. The sun rises each morning because God says, "Do it again," not out of monotony but out of pleasure at seeing His creation do what it was made to do. The flowers of the field are so very similar not because God found the job of creation so dull that He simply used a mold to ease the process of duplication, but rather because He found a single flower so appealing that He said, "Do it again! Make another. That one is good too. Make another. And another."
Tomorrow, God will tell the sun to rise again, and He will see that it is good. And when the sun rises, He will tell me to get up and do it again, to lay myself down at His feet, to die to myself, and to rise again in Christ to live for Him. And He will see that it is very good, and He will be pleased with me. I say that not out of arrogance and pride, expecting to be a pleasing offering to God, but out of hope in Christ. When Jesus was baptized in the Jordan River, the Holy Spirit anointed Him in the appearance of a dove, and the Father's voice came from heaven, saying, "This is My Son, whom I love; with Him I am well pleased" (Matthew 3:17). He did not say, "With His work I am well pleased." Jesus had not begun His recorded ministry yet. As far as we see in Scripture, Jesus had not yet done anything that would merit a declaration of God's pleasure in Him. Yet we hear that God said, "In Him I am well pleased." This was said that we might see that it is not in our works that our Father takes delight, but in our being. That's it. The mere fact that we exist. And that we choose Him, because of course, we are corrupted by sin, and that's not good; but the forgiveness we have in His Son redeems us so that He can look at us and say, "It is good. In you I am well pleased."
The last few days, I have felt discouraged because I feel that I am not leading anyone when I could be leading kids at Camp Highland. So as I was praying and having some quiet time, I started looking for encouragement. I have a funny habit of kind of silently preaching to myself sometimes. Not really praying, and not really talking to myself, but more like preaching to a congregation with myself as the only member. As I was doing this, my mind began to form the words of encouragement, "God is pleased with me. He is pleased with my work." Then I had to stop myself. What have I done to please God? Are my works what save me? Is that what makes God look at me and find me holy and innocent? No. He is pleased with me. Just the fact that I am me. I am who He made me to be. Just as the sun performs its duty in accordance with its identity, so I am pleasing to God by being myself and fulfilling the purpose God has given me in this moment in time.
He is pleased with me. So I will do it again!
Chesterton illustrates this idea in this way: Adults and older youth often grow bored with activities quickly. There must always be a sense of novelty in order for a thing to be of interest. There must always be a sense of forward motion. An infant or young child, on the other hand, will often say, "Do it again!" whenever he finds a phenomenon entertaining, and he will not cease to repeat the phrase until he is sufficiently satisfied.
Take, for example, a circle and a spiral as another analogy. In education, we refer to what is called "spiral curriculum," in which one will return to familiar material in order to address new levels of the subject. For example, one may learn that multiplication is like adding multiple times (2x4 is like 2+2+2+2), then later return to learn the multiplication tables, then later return to learn how to multiply multi-digit factors, then later return to introduce variables as possible factors and products. In education, we see the spiral as the model for progress. So what about the circle then? Would that be a symbol of stagnation? What if we took the circle and changed our perspective so that it became not a two-dimensional geometric shape, but a wheel. It is a wheel, not a spiral, that allows a vehicle to move forward. The one who is content to remain in the same place relative to the body for an extended period of time, will find that he has made significant progress for himself and for the whole body, though he remains attached to the same axle.
Time and time again God has brought me back to this idea of sitting at His feet and resting in the truth, waiting for His teachings on a particular subject to sink in before moving on to anything new. But I can never sit still. Metaphorically. I always have to get up and move around. I have to be constantly learning something new, or else I feel like I'm not progressing. I can't just be content to hear the same thing taught to me over and over again until it gets through to me... because I often feel like I already know what He's trying to tell me. I've heard it all before. Or so I think. And I don't hear Him through.
Chesterton idealizes the image of a child laughing and urging his entertainer to "do it again" by putting the lens up against the Creation. The sun rises each morning because God says, "Do it again," not out of monotony but out of pleasure at seeing His creation do what it was made to do. The flowers of the field are so very similar not because God found the job of creation so dull that He simply used a mold to ease the process of duplication, but rather because He found a single flower so appealing that He said, "Do it again! Make another. That one is good too. Make another. And another."
Tomorrow, God will tell the sun to rise again, and He will see that it is good. And when the sun rises, He will tell me to get up and do it again, to lay myself down at His feet, to die to myself, and to rise again in Christ to live for Him. And He will see that it is very good, and He will be pleased with me. I say that not out of arrogance and pride, expecting to be a pleasing offering to God, but out of hope in Christ. When Jesus was baptized in the Jordan River, the Holy Spirit anointed Him in the appearance of a dove, and the Father's voice came from heaven, saying, "This is My Son, whom I love; with Him I am well pleased" (Matthew 3:17). He did not say, "With His work I am well pleased." Jesus had not begun His recorded ministry yet. As far as we see in Scripture, Jesus had not yet done anything that would merit a declaration of God's pleasure in Him. Yet we hear that God said, "In Him I am well pleased." This was said that we might see that it is not in our works that our Father takes delight, but in our being. That's it. The mere fact that we exist. And that we choose Him, because of course, we are corrupted by sin, and that's not good; but the forgiveness we have in His Son redeems us so that He can look at us and say, "It is good. In you I am well pleased."
The last few days, I have felt discouraged because I feel that I am not leading anyone when I could be leading kids at Camp Highland. So as I was praying and having some quiet time, I started looking for encouragement. I have a funny habit of kind of silently preaching to myself sometimes. Not really praying, and not really talking to myself, but more like preaching to a congregation with myself as the only member. As I was doing this, my mind began to form the words of encouragement, "God is pleased with me. He is pleased with my work." Then I had to stop myself. What have I done to please God? Are my works what save me? Is that what makes God look at me and find me holy and innocent? No. He is pleased with me. Just the fact that I am me. I am who He made me to be. Just as the sun performs its duty in accordance with its identity, so I am pleasing to God by being myself and fulfilling the purpose God has given me in this moment in time.
He is pleased with me. So I will do it again!
Tuesday, July 8, 2014
Hutututu
We call it the most holy game of Camp Highland. It is the game at camp. To remove it from Camp Highland would cause us to cease being Camp Highland. It is a way of life.
That may be an exaggeration, but there is no doubt that Hutututu is Camp Highland's most favored tribal game, with ultimate frisbee being its closest competitor among the staff. And as with anything, there are countless lessons that can be taken away from the game. During our staff training one day, we read the stories of Samuel and David facing the Philistines in 1 Samuel 7 and 17, and I was struck by the reflection of Hutututu in the story of David facing Goliath.
In Hutututu, one person crosses from his side to enter the territory of the opposing tribe, chanting, "Hutututu," repeatedly in a single breath. His goal is to tag as many people as possible and cross back over to his tribal territory before taking another breath. The opposing tribe's objective is to avoid being tagged and to keep the invader from escaping back to his side. Often one defender will latch onto the attacker, and the rest of the defending tribe will swarm to his aid to hold back the attacker until he runs out of breath. This is the picture we see in the story of David and Goliath.
In the battle of the Israelites versus the Philistines, one mighty warrior named Goliath stepped forward to challenge the opposition, shouting out threats to any who might dare to step forward against him. Then David, one bold enough to accept the challenge, came forward and faced the menacing giant. David struck Goliath with a stone and brought him to his end, as in Hutututu one might grapple with an attacker to hold him back. When Goliath had been defeated, the Israelite troops rallied to conquer the remainder of the Philistine army, just as one's tribe would rally to his aid as he fights to hold back an invader.
This picture of battle gives us a model for how we ought to pray. The Apostle Paul has much to say on the topic of prayer, often speaking of his own prayers for the Church and asking for prayer from the Church. In Philippians 4:6, we are called to not only pray to the Lord but also to petition the Lord, or intercede with the Lord, for our own needs and for the needs of others. When we pray, we speak individually with God. When we petition, we call upon the body of believers to pray in agreement with us. In Colossians 4:2, we are urged, "Devote yourselves to prayer, being watchful and thankful." When David stood up to Goliath and the Israelites saw his triumph, I imagine that they were watching closely to see the results and that they were thankful when the Lord brought victory through the bold young shepherd. As soon as Goliath fell, I envision the Israelites watching in awe as David stepped forward to seize the giant's sword, all hands gravitating toward their own weapons as the blade swung down to sever the glory of the Philistine champion from his people. Likewise, we are to be watchful and thankful in prayer, staying alert to recognize the needs of others (Ephesians 6:18), giving thanks for the first signs of victory and immediately jumping to usher in total triumph as soon as a foothold has been gained. Jesus says in Matthew 11:12, "From the days of John the Baptist until now, the kingdom of heaven has been forcefully advancing, and forceful men lay hold of it." E.M. Bounds asserts in his book The Essentials of Prayer, "The present ground we occupy must be held by making advances, and all the future must be covered and brightened by it." Many battles have been won so far this summer, and now it is time to celebrate in the Lord's triumph and to welcome Him to come and bring the completion of His victory. Even better is yet to come. Pray with me, and allow me to pray with you too. Come quickly, Lord (Revelation 22:20).
That may be an exaggeration, but there is no doubt that Hutututu is Camp Highland's most favored tribal game, with ultimate frisbee being its closest competitor among the staff. And as with anything, there are countless lessons that can be taken away from the game. During our staff training one day, we read the stories of Samuel and David facing the Philistines in 1 Samuel 7 and 17, and I was struck by the reflection of Hutututu in the story of David facing Goliath.
In Hutututu, one person crosses from his side to enter the territory of the opposing tribe, chanting, "Hutututu," repeatedly in a single breath. His goal is to tag as many people as possible and cross back over to his tribal territory before taking another breath. The opposing tribe's objective is to avoid being tagged and to keep the invader from escaping back to his side. Often one defender will latch onto the attacker, and the rest of the defending tribe will swarm to his aid to hold back the attacker until he runs out of breath. This is the picture we see in the story of David and Goliath.
In the battle of the Israelites versus the Philistines, one mighty warrior named Goliath stepped forward to challenge the opposition, shouting out threats to any who might dare to step forward against him. Then David, one bold enough to accept the challenge, came forward and faced the menacing giant. David struck Goliath with a stone and brought him to his end, as in Hutututu one might grapple with an attacker to hold him back. When Goliath had been defeated, the Israelite troops rallied to conquer the remainder of the Philistine army, just as one's tribe would rally to his aid as he fights to hold back an invader.
This picture of battle gives us a model for how we ought to pray. The Apostle Paul has much to say on the topic of prayer, often speaking of his own prayers for the Church and asking for prayer from the Church. In Philippians 4:6, we are called to not only pray to the Lord but also to petition the Lord, or intercede with the Lord, for our own needs and for the needs of others. When we pray, we speak individually with God. When we petition, we call upon the body of believers to pray in agreement with us. In Colossians 4:2, we are urged, "Devote yourselves to prayer, being watchful and thankful." When David stood up to Goliath and the Israelites saw his triumph, I imagine that they were watching closely to see the results and that they were thankful when the Lord brought victory through the bold young shepherd. As soon as Goliath fell, I envision the Israelites watching in awe as David stepped forward to seize the giant's sword, all hands gravitating toward their own weapons as the blade swung down to sever the glory of the Philistine champion from his people. Likewise, we are to be watchful and thankful in prayer, staying alert to recognize the needs of others (Ephesians 6:18), giving thanks for the first signs of victory and immediately jumping to usher in total triumph as soon as a foothold has been gained. Jesus says in Matthew 11:12, "From the days of John the Baptist until now, the kingdom of heaven has been forcefully advancing, and forceful men lay hold of it." E.M. Bounds asserts in his book The Essentials of Prayer, "The present ground we occupy must be held by making advances, and all the future must be covered and brightened by it." Many battles have been won so far this summer, and now it is time to celebrate in the Lord's triumph and to welcome Him to come and bring the completion of His victory. Even better is yet to come. Pray with me, and allow me to pray with you too. Come quickly, Lord (Revelation 22:20).
Silence Above the Noise
God has provided me with a unique opportunity through my time at Camp Highland this year. Having just graduated from UGA back in May, I am currently searching for a job as a music educator; however, I felt that the Lord was calling me to return to serve at camp again this summer, which put a temporary halt on the job hunt. So to compromise, I remained at camp only for the first half of the summer, and now I am back at home to resume my search. At this point, there are no prospects, but the Lord has opened up the option of joining the full time staff at Camp Highland starting in the fall. I don't know if that is what He has chosen as my path or if it's just my desire to do what's easiest, so I still have a lot of praying to do, and I would appreciate your prayers on the matter as well.
Anyway, back to my original point, because I am now at home only halfway through the summer, my time at camp is still fresh in my mind. And in my journal. I was going back through my notes from the summer, and God brought me across several lessons He had introduced to me earlier and which are still very powerful and relevant now. So I am going to try to post some of the things He has been teaching me so far this summer.
One day during staff training, it was raining pretty hard during our Time Alone with God (TAG)—well, it rained several days during staff training, but God spoke through it this one particular morning. I am just going to record what I wrote that morning.
"We are having TAG time under a pavilion in the rain. The sound of water hitting the tin roof is roaring all around us, but our silence in communing with God is louder than the storm. When we were being briefed for today's TAG, I could barely hear the instructions. Now the roar of the rain has become louder and more awesome, but we are kept dry by the roof over our heads, and we continue to listen for Your voice.
In the storms of my life, I need to learn to sit and rest in Your shelter. Too often I stand and wander around in Your presence, complaining about the rain that keeps me from going out. But that is the purpose of the shelter in the storm: to keep us in Your presence and in the path of Your commands when everything around me will leave stains. I want to go out into the world and take on Satan's armies, but Your shelter lets me know that here is where You want me."
We have a pretty loud and talkative staff this year (not necessarily a bad thing—we love community), which has also been reflected in our campers each week. So for all 50-60 of us to be sitting silently under a single pavilion in the pouring rain was incredible. The silence was powerful and almost tangible, despite the roar of the rain. There's a lot of life's noise roaring all around me right now, and I often to contribute to it with my doubts and worry and my need to be active. But the Lord reminds me that stillness is not inactivity but holy rest. I need to remember to make time to draw back and be quiet and wait on God. This will give me the rest I need to regain my strength and energy for when the time comes to be active.
Anyway, back to my original point, because I am now at home only halfway through the summer, my time at camp is still fresh in my mind. And in my journal. I was going back through my notes from the summer, and God brought me across several lessons He had introduced to me earlier and which are still very powerful and relevant now. So I am going to try to post some of the things He has been teaching me so far this summer.
One day during staff training, it was raining pretty hard during our Time Alone with God (TAG)—well, it rained several days during staff training, but God spoke through it this one particular morning. I am just going to record what I wrote that morning.
"We are having TAG time under a pavilion in the rain. The sound of water hitting the tin roof is roaring all around us, but our silence in communing with God is louder than the storm. When we were being briefed for today's TAG, I could barely hear the instructions. Now the roar of the rain has become louder and more awesome, but we are kept dry by the roof over our heads, and we continue to listen for Your voice.
In the storms of my life, I need to learn to sit and rest in Your shelter. Too often I stand and wander around in Your presence, complaining about the rain that keeps me from going out. But that is the purpose of the shelter in the storm: to keep us in Your presence and in the path of Your commands when everything around me will leave stains. I want to go out into the world and take on Satan's armies, but Your shelter lets me know that here is where You want me."
We have a pretty loud and talkative staff this year (not necessarily a bad thing—we love community), which has also been reflected in our campers each week. So for all 50-60 of us to be sitting silently under a single pavilion in the pouring rain was incredible. The silence was powerful and almost tangible, despite the roar of the rain. There's a lot of life's noise roaring all around me right now, and I often to contribute to it with my doubts and worry and my need to be active. But the Lord reminds me that stillness is not inactivity but holy rest. I need to remember to make time to draw back and be quiet and wait on God. This will give me the rest I need to regain my strength and energy for when the time comes to be active.
Saturday, February 22, 2014
Dressed at the Quarry
It's crazy how fast time flies by. It's hard to believe that I'll be graduating from UGA in a matter of months. I'm doing my student teaching this semester, ten weeks in a middle school and five in a high school, and I have to say that my time in the middle school has been incredible so far. I'm learning a lot really quickly, and not just about music and teaching. The Lord has given me a unique opportunity to grow in my knowledge of Him and my role in the plan He has for me in a "secular" public school setting. It helps that, despite the polar differences between our personalities, my cooperating teacher and I share the same faith in our Savior. It has been awesome getting to see practical applications of gospel-centered living in the education field, and God has been teaching me a lot of things about Himself and His Church through none other than music analogies.
One particular analogy that hit me today actually started to sneak into my mind last weekend. My discipleship partner and I have been reading 1 Kings to become more familiar with history in the Old Testament, so on Saturday, I read chapter 6 on Solomon's work on the Jewish temple. The part that stuck out to me as I was reading it was verse 7: "In building the temple, only blocks dressed at the quarry were used, and no hammer, chisel or any other iron tool was heard at the temple site while it was being built." What's interesting to me about this verse is that the image of the quiet temple site is like a picture of heaven: we are the stones and blocks found at the quarry, and only those that are dressed where they are found are suitable to be used in the building of the Temple, the Body of Christ. Any stone that arrived at the temple site unprepared would have been considered useless for the work required of it and would have been discarded. Likewise, the Day of Judgment will be too late for us to dress ourselves for the Lord's service. Only those who are clothed with the righteousness of Christ here in this quarry of living stones called Earth will be approved for the high honor of being used as a building block in the Temple of our Lord. All others will discarded at the Gate. No work of sanctification will be done at Heaven's Gates. No tool of trials will be heard there.
Now, this revelation was an exciting find as it is, but then Monday rolled around, and the lesson came up as a relevant topic in the day's band classes. The bands are currently in preparation for Large Group Performance Evaluations (LGPE) and our spring concert. As a result, there has been a process going on of refining the ensemble that will be going to LGPE. This means that those students who do not know their music are being removed. They still remain in the band and participate in class, but they are not included in the honor band that will be going to LGPE. Each individual must know his or her part before the whole ensemble can rehearse together. If some students are coming to rehearsal with wrong notes and rhythms, things which should be hashed out in their practicing at home, then the musical needs that are supposed to be addressed in group rehearsals cannot be appropriately addressed. The sweetness of a cake cannot be adjusted if the baker is using salt instead of sugar. Like the temple blocks, each musician must come to rehearsal with his or her part prepared if quality music is to be produced. When each stone is prepared—when musician is prepared—only then can they be put together and decorated to make a presentable, appealing masterpiece.
This lesson was followed up on Thursday when one of the sixth grade classes repeatedly failed to keep a steady beat. A question came to mind, to which several of the kids thought they had an answer, but they were trying to justify their thinking when no justification was available. When the class failed to keep a steady beat, I turned the metronome on and put it on the overhead speakers; they were able to stay together then. So the question arose: If you can stay together and keep a steady beat by listening, what happens when the beat you are listening to is not steady? If I am asking you to get your steady beat by watching me, and nobody is watching me, how do any of you know that your tempo is the right tempo? The right answer? There's no way to know. The only way is to watch the conductor. But even if one person is watching and everyone is listening to that one person, how do you know that he or she is right? Plus, how are you going to hear that one person over the deafening distractions caused by everyone else playing over that one person? Again, these were rhetorical questions to get the students to realize that the only way to stay together at the right tempo is by watching the director. They are not yet at the level at which they should be listening to each other. At this point, my goal is almost to get them to ignore each other when they play so that they only hear what they are playing individually in relation to the tempo I am showing them. Only when each and every individual has learned to watch and stay with the conductor will they be at the level at which they can properly listen to each other. Only when each one knows his part and knows it in relation to what I dictate is the steady beat can they begin to make their notes and rhythms a musical part of the creative whole.
Now take that same lesson and imagine the band as the Church and the director as Jesus. Jesus Himself said that "the Son can do nothing by himself; he can do only what he sees his Father doing" (John 5:19). If we are all listening to each other to find the footsteps of God, how do we know that we are following the right path? Even if one member of the Church is watching the Father and we listen to him, how do we know that he is pursuing holiness according to Scripture? And how are we to clearly hear him over the distractions of this world and all the false gospels being preached? The answer? We cannot except by keeping our eyes on Christ. And not just one of us or a few of us, but each and every single member of the Body must have his eyes on our heavenly Conductor. And not all of us plays the same part in the divine orchestra. We must each know our part, our role in God's plan for all of Creation, before the Holy Spirit can unite us and refine us into a harmony pleasing to the Lord. Only then, when every individual has his eyes on the Cross, when we are each in a right relationship with God, can we listen to one another and come into the right relation with one another. Only when every block is dressed to the proper specifications can every block be put together as a whole to create the Temple. When the whole is not united to the One, the whole cannot truly be a whole. When the whole is united to the One, only then are we wholly united as one.
It's funny: when God was sharing this revelation with me earlier today, I was starting to get a little annoyed because I was trying to read and couldn't concentrate because I kept thinking about all these cool lessons I was learning through my student teaching and all the lessons I wanted to teach my students. Then this whole message solidified, and I had to stop out of sheer amazement at the way God uses everything to display His glory and His sovereign hand in all things. I am so thankful that He has set me on this path as a music educator, with music and Scripture so finely tuned in perfect harmony for me to hear and see in what is to be my everyday profession. May we all keep our eyes on our heavenly Conductor, and may we all play our parts for His glory alone, that we may be in perfect harmony with one another as a clear reflection of Him.
One particular analogy that hit me today actually started to sneak into my mind last weekend. My discipleship partner and I have been reading 1 Kings to become more familiar with history in the Old Testament, so on Saturday, I read chapter 6 on Solomon's work on the Jewish temple. The part that stuck out to me as I was reading it was verse 7: "In building the temple, only blocks dressed at the quarry were used, and no hammer, chisel or any other iron tool was heard at the temple site while it was being built." What's interesting to me about this verse is that the image of the quiet temple site is like a picture of heaven: we are the stones and blocks found at the quarry, and only those that are dressed where they are found are suitable to be used in the building of the Temple, the Body of Christ. Any stone that arrived at the temple site unprepared would have been considered useless for the work required of it and would have been discarded. Likewise, the Day of Judgment will be too late for us to dress ourselves for the Lord's service. Only those who are clothed with the righteousness of Christ here in this quarry of living stones called Earth will be approved for the high honor of being used as a building block in the Temple of our Lord. All others will discarded at the Gate. No work of sanctification will be done at Heaven's Gates. No tool of trials will be heard there.
Now, this revelation was an exciting find as it is, but then Monday rolled around, and the lesson came up as a relevant topic in the day's band classes. The bands are currently in preparation for Large Group Performance Evaluations (LGPE) and our spring concert. As a result, there has been a process going on of refining the ensemble that will be going to LGPE. This means that those students who do not know their music are being removed. They still remain in the band and participate in class, but they are not included in the honor band that will be going to LGPE. Each individual must know his or her part before the whole ensemble can rehearse together. If some students are coming to rehearsal with wrong notes and rhythms, things which should be hashed out in their practicing at home, then the musical needs that are supposed to be addressed in group rehearsals cannot be appropriately addressed. The sweetness of a cake cannot be adjusted if the baker is using salt instead of sugar. Like the temple blocks, each musician must come to rehearsal with his or her part prepared if quality music is to be produced. When each stone is prepared—when musician is prepared—only then can they be put together and decorated to make a presentable, appealing masterpiece.
This lesson was followed up on Thursday when one of the sixth grade classes repeatedly failed to keep a steady beat. A question came to mind, to which several of the kids thought they had an answer, but they were trying to justify their thinking when no justification was available. When the class failed to keep a steady beat, I turned the metronome on and put it on the overhead speakers; they were able to stay together then. So the question arose: If you can stay together and keep a steady beat by listening, what happens when the beat you are listening to is not steady? If I am asking you to get your steady beat by watching me, and nobody is watching me, how do any of you know that your tempo is the right tempo? The right answer? There's no way to know. The only way is to watch the conductor. But even if one person is watching and everyone is listening to that one person, how do you know that he or she is right? Plus, how are you going to hear that one person over the deafening distractions caused by everyone else playing over that one person? Again, these were rhetorical questions to get the students to realize that the only way to stay together at the right tempo is by watching the director. They are not yet at the level at which they should be listening to each other. At this point, my goal is almost to get them to ignore each other when they play so that they only hear what they are playing individually in relation to the tempo I am showing them. Only when each and every individual has learned to watch and stay with the conductor will they be at the level at which they can properly listen to each other. Only when each one knows his part and knows it in relation to what I dictate is the steady beat can they begin to make their notes and rhythms a musical part of the creative whole.
Now take that same lesson and imagine the band as the Church and the director as Jesus. Jesus Himself said that "the Son can do nothing by himself; he can do only what he sees his Father doing" (John 5:19). If we are all listening to each other to find the footsteps of God, how do we know that we are following the right path? Even if one member of the Church is watching the Father and we listen to him, how do we know that he is pursuing holiness according to Scripture? And how are we to clearly hear him over the distractions of this world and all the false gospels being preached? The answer? We cannot except by keeping our eyes on Christ. And not just one of us or a few of us, but each and every single member of the Body must have his eyes on our heavenly Conductor. And not all of us plays the same part in the divine orchestra. We must each know our part, our role in God's plan for all of Creation, before the Holy Spirit can unite us and refine us into a harmony pleasing to the Lord. Only then, when every individual has his eyes on the Cross, when we are each in a right relationship with God, can we listen to one another and come into the right relation with one another. Only when every block is dressed to the proper specifications can every block be put together as a whole to create the Temple. When the whole is not united to the One, the whole cannot truly be a whole. When the whole is united to the One, only then are we wholly united as one.
It's funny: when God was sharing this revelation with me earlier today, I was starting to get a little annoyed because I was trying to read and couldn't concentrate because I kept thinking about all these cool lessons I was learning through my student teaching and all the lessons I wanted to teach my students. Then this whole message solidified, and I had to stop out of sheer amazement at the way God uses everything to display His glory and His sovereign hand in all things. I am so thankful that He has set me on this path as a music educator, with music and Scripture so finely tuned in perfect harmony for me to hear and see in what is to be my everyday profession. May we all keep our eyes on our heavenly Conductor, and may we all play our parts for His glory alone, that we may be in perfect harmony with one another as a clear reflection of Him.
Sunday, December 15, 2013
Priority Devotion
"Very early in the morning, while it was still dark, Jesus got up, left
the house and went off to a solitary place, where He prayed." ~ Mark
1:35
This verse comes up frequently among people who begin to get bogged down with life and start to drift in their devotion to God. It serves as a reminder that Jesus is our priority, even above our own lives, and it convicts by showing that when Jesus was at His busiest, He was the most immersed in His time with His Father. This has been a recurring theme for me this semester because, despite an apparently lighter course load, I found myself getting more buried under schoolwork than ever. But there is more to this verse that can be found in the context that surrounds it.
To put things into perspective, our text begins in verse 21. Jesus and His disciples had just arrived in Capernaum, and based on verses 30 and 31, I believe verses 21 through 38 all happened within the same 36 hours or so—scholars may have discovered otherwise, and I'm open to being corrected. My reasoning? Simon Peter's mother-in-law was sick, and if Jesus and His disciples had been staying at Simon and Andrew's house, I would think that Jesus would have already healed Peter's mother-in-law. I would not expect them to leave the house in the morning and come back that night to find her with a crippling fever. There would have been early signs. So that night at Simon and Andrew's house, I think, would have been their first night in Capernaum.
So our day begins on the Sabbath with their arrival in Capernaum. Jesus went into the synagogue to teach and was met by a man possessed by an evil spirit, whom Jesus set free. Afterward, they retired to Simon and Andrew's house, where Jesus healed Simon's mother-in-law. But that wasn't the end of the night. In verse 32 we see that people were bringing the sick and demon-possessed to Jesus to be healed after dark. There is no telling how late they were up, but the fact that the "whole town gathered at the door" (v. 33) is a good indicator that they were up well into the night.
Now we get to verse 35. So consider this: You get up Sunday morning and go to church. You're a surgeon, and you get a call informing you that you have several unexpected operations lined up for you that afternoon. You go in and operate, then return home, only to receive another call after dinner that an emergency procedure is required of you immediately. You return to work and perform the operation. Word spreads throughout the hospital: 'Good news! The best surgeon in the region is in the building.' Staff and patients alike hear the news, and all of the patients lined up for surgery are rushed to your care. It's late, but you continue to work, knowing that these patients' lives could depend on your self-sacrifice. (Not the most practical analogy, but just go with it.)
Finally, the last operation is done, and you go home. Exhausted, you climb in bed and immediately fall asleep. You sleep for a couple hours, but it feels like only minutes when something stirs and awakens you. Somehow you find yourself wide awake, though you know you've had nowhere near enough sleep, so you climb out of bed and go for a walk to pray. After all, your Sabbath was not much of a holy day of rest. You have company at your house, but they can manage without you until you return—besides, they'll still be asleep for another hour or two. You turn your phone off so you can enjoy some quiet time with the Lord without disturbance, and you walk to a nearby park. You take a seat on a bench in your favorite secluded spot, hidden by trees, and suddenly your mind begins to race with countless prayers for the lost, for the growth of those who have already received salvation, for the needs of the poor and homeless, for provision for the sick who are without necessary healthcare, for the stressed parents and unruly children at your church, for families of deceased patients... Your mind wanders as you pray for every thought that pops into your head. You look around, and the beauty of nature around you makes you praise God for all His wonders. A church bell rings, counting the hours, but you pay no attention to the time. You can't. You're too busy confessing your sins to your heavenly Father and thanking Him for His forgiveness and the gift of Jesus' sacrifice on the cross. Then you begin to hear voices. You open your eyes and notice that the sun is high overhead as the voices draw closer. You turn your phone back on and find that you have several missed calls from your guests. Rising from your bench, you walk out of the secluded area into the open, where your guests are searching for you high and low. When you are reunited with them, something takes a hold of you and you suggest a road trip. Confused, they agree, and you all hop in the car and drive off to who knows where, not to return home until a few days later.
That was Jesus' day. He began the day arriving in Capernaum from out of town, and immediately went to teach. After returning home, He found not one healing to perform, but many, going late into the night. Before the sun had even risen the next day, He got up and left, feeling hungry for time with His Father. He wandered off without His disciples' knowledge and found a quiet place, isolated from the public. When His disciples awoke, they found Him missing and went searching for Him. He had gone missing not just long enough for His disciples to notice, but long enough for them to look for Him and eventually find Him. And after He had been found, they left right away to continue traveling and preaching the gospel.
Yes, Jesus got up early in the morning and went off to a quiet place to ensure that He had adequate time to devote to His Father (v. 35), but He did so much more than that. He devoted Himself to serving those He cared about (v. 30-31). He devoted Himself to serving those who came to Him looking for help (v. 32-34). He allowed Himself to be interrupted (v. 23-26, 32-34). He devoted Himself to fellowship with His friends (v. 31b). He started His day with meeting with His Father and did not cut His time short until He was needed (v. 35-37). And He remained devoted to His task above and beyond His physical desires (v. 38). Jesus didn't just fit God into a busy schedule. He made sacrifices to ensure that His Father was integrated into His entire schedule, even when things began to pile up all at once without warning.
Here Jesus addresses, by His actions, the Fourth Commandment and His later explanation of the Sabbath in Mark 2:23-28. The Fourth Commandment is often abbreviated to "keep the Sabbath day holy," but there is more to it than that. Exodus 20:9-10 says, "Six days you shall labor and do all your work, but the seventh day is a Sabbath to the Lord your God." Verse 9 cannot be ignored if we are to indeed enjoy the Sabbath. A day of rest must be balanced with work the remainder of the week. Six days of public service and interaction must be balanced with a day of total devotion to spending time alone with God. When Jesus found that His time with His Father was going to be interrupted that Sabbath, He determined to set aside the following day for the purpose so that His work would not be hindered presently and so that He would not be drained for the following week's work. The Sabbath was made for man's benefit, and the Lord will not contradict His commands. If the Lord determines that work is to be done on a particular Sabbath day, another Sabbath rest will be provided in its place, if man will only seek Him earnestly.
This post is getting to be much longer than I intended, so I'll try to wrap it up. For my Western Civilizations class, I had to read Survival in Auschwitz, by Primo Levi, and I was surprised to find an entire two pages directly applicable to this lesson of devotion in the midst of a busy schedule. The author and narrator began to question why one would continue with the meaningless habit of washing oneself every day when the grime of the day's work would return to cover everyone again before the day's end. Steinlauf, a fellow inmate in the labor camp, gave him some insight into the matter: The labor camps are intended to make animals of men, and it is for precisely that reason that they must continue with daily habits of civilized life, that they may cling to civilized life and resist devolving into beasts. Likewise, it is because Satan intends to crowd God out of our schedules that we must increasingly devote ourselves to the Lord in our busiest times. Jesus understood this best, and it is time I began to learn this lesson and apply it to my daily life.
This verse comes up frequently among people who begin to get bogged down with life and start to drift in their devotion to God. It serves as a reminder that Jesus is our priority, even above our own lives, and it convicts by showing that when Jesus was at His busiest, He was the most immersed in His time with His Father. This has been a recurring theme for me this semester because, despite an apparently lighter course load, I found myself getting more buried under schoolwork than ever. But there is more to this verse that can be found in the context that surrounds it.
To put things into perspective, our text begins in verse 21. Jesus and His disciples had just arrived in Capernaum, and based on verses 30 and 31, I believe verses 21 through 38 all happened within the same 36 hours or so—scholars may have discovered otherwise, and I'm open to being corrected. My reasoning? Simon Peter's mother-in-law was sick, and if Jesus and His disciples had been staying at Simon and Andrew's house, I would think that Jesus would have already healed Peter's mother-in-law. I would not expect them to leave the house in the morning and come back that night to find her with a crippling fever. There would have been early signs. So that night at Simon and Andrew's house, I think, would have been their first night in Capernaum.
So our day begins on the Sabbath with their arrival in Capernaum. Jesus went into the synagogue to teach and was met by a man possessed by an evil spirit, whom Jesus set free. Afterward, they retired to Simon and Andrew's house, where Jesus healed Simon's mother-in-law. But that wasn't the end of the night. In verse 32 we see that people were bringing the sick and demon-possessed to Jesus to be healed after dark. There is no telling how late they were up, but the fact that the "whole town gathered at the door" (v. 33) is a good indicator that they were up well into the night.
Now we get to verse 35. So consider this: You get up Sunday morning and go to church. You're a surgeon, and you get a call informing you that you have several unexpected operations lined up for you that afternoon. You go in and operate, then return home, only to receive another call after dinner that an emergency procedure is required of you immediately. You return to work and perform the operation. Word spreads throughout the hospital: 'Good news! The best surgeon in the region is in the building.' Staff and patients alike hear the news, and all of the patients lined up for surgery are rushed to your care. It's late, but you continue to work, knowing that these patients' lives could depend on your self-sacrifice. (Not the most practical analogy, but just go with it.)
Finally, the last operation is done, and you go home. Exhausted, you climb in bed and immediately fall asleep. You sleep for a couple hours, but it feels like only minutes when something stirs and awakens you. Somehow you find yourself wide awake, though you know you've had nowhere near enough sleep, so you climb out of bed and go for a walk to pray. After all, your Sabbath was not much of a holy day of rest. You have company at your house, but they can manage without you until you return—besides, they'll still be asleep for another hour or two. You turn your phone off so you can enjoy some quiet time with the Lord without disturbance, and you walk to a nearby park. You take a seat on a bench in your favorite secluded spot, hidden by trees, and suddenly your mind begins to race with countless prayers for the lost, for the growth of those who have already received salvation, for the needs of the poor and homeless, for provision for the sick who are without necessary healthcare, for the stressed parents and unruly children at your church, for families of deceased patients... Your mind wanders as you pray for every thought that pops into your head. You look around, and the beauty of nature around you makes you praise God for all His wonders. A church bell rings, counting the hours, but you pay no attention to the time. You can't. You're too busy confessing your sins to your heavenly Father and thanking Him for His forgiveness and the gift of Jesus' sacrifice on the cross. Then you begin to hear voices. You open your eyes and notice that the sun is high overhead as the voices draw closer. You turn your phone back on and find that you have several missed calls from your guests. Rising from your bench, you walk out of the secluded area into the open, where your guests are searching for you high and low. When you are reunited with them, something takes a hold of you and you suggest a road trip. Confused, they agree, and you all hop in the car and drive off to who knows where, not to return home until a few days later.
That was Jesus' day. He began the day arriving in Capernaum from out of town, and immediately went to teach. After returning home, He found not one healing to perform, but many, going late into the night. Before the sun had even risen the next day, He got up and left, feeling hungry for time with His Father. He wandered off without His disciples' knowledge and found a quiet place, isolated from the public. When His disciples awoke, they found Him missing and went searching for Him. He had gone missing not just long enough for His disciples to notice, but long enough for them to look for Him and eventually find Him. And after He had been found, they left right away to continue traveling and preaching the gospel.
Yes, Jesus got up early in the morning and went off to a quiet place to ensure that He had adequate time to devote to His Father (v. 35), but He did so much more than that. He devoted Himself to serving those He cared about (v. 30-31). He devoted Himself to serving those who came to Him looking for help (v. 32-34). He allowed Himself to be interrupted (v. 23-26, 32-34). He devoted Himself to fellowship with His friends (v. 31b). He started His day with meeting with His Father and did not cut His time short until He was needed (v. 35-37). And He remained devoted to His task above and beyond His physical desires (v. 38). Jesus didn't just fit God into a busy schedule. He made sacrifices to ensure that His Father was integrated into His entire schedule, even when things began to pile up all at once without warning.
Here Jesus addresses, by His actions, the Fourth Commandment and His later explanation of the Sabbath in Mark 2:23-28. The Fourth Commandment is often abbreviated to "keep the Sabbath day holy," but there is more to it than that. Exodus 20:9-10 says, "Six days you shall labor and do all your work, but the seventh day is a Sabbath to the Lord your God." Verse 9 cannot be ignored if we are to indeed enjoy the Sabbath. A day of rest must be balanced with work the remainder of the week. Six days of public service and interaction must be balanced with a day of total devotion to spending time alone with God. When Jesus found that His time with His Father was going to be interrupted that Sabbath, He determined to set aside the following day for the purpose so that His work would not be hindered presently and so that He would not be drained for the following week's work. The Sabbath was made for man's benefit, and the Lord will not contradict His commands. If the Lord determines that work is to be done on a particular Sabbath day, another Sabbath rest will be provided in its place, if man will only seek Him earnestly.
This post is getting to be much longer than I intended, so I'll try to wrap it up. For my Western Civilizations class, I had to read Survival in Auschwitz, by Primo Levi, and I was surprised to find an entire two pages directly applicable to this lesson of devotion in the midst of a busy schedule. The author and narrator began to question why one would continue with the meaningless habit of washing oneself every day when the grime of the day's work would return to cover everyone again before the day's end. Steinlauf, a fellow inmate in the labor camp, gave him some insight into the matter: The labor camps are intended to make animals of men, and it is for precisely that reason that they must continue with daily habits of civilized life, that they may cling to civilized life and resist devolving into beasts. Likewise, it is because Satan intends to crowd God out of our schedules that we must increasingly devote ourselves to the Lord in our busiest times. Jesus understood this best, and it is time I began to learn this lesson and apply it to my daily life.
Saturday, August 24, 2013
12:10
Romans 12:10 says, "Be devoted to one another in brotherly love. Honor one another above yourselves." The ESV says, "Love one another with brotherly affection. Outdo one another in showing honor." Last summer this became kind of a theme verse a few of the counselors at Camp Highland. Our only "rule" at camp is that we show honor toward each other and toward camp property. Any time this was not happening, a quick reminder of "12:10" would bring to mind the verse we had been focusing on all week.
This year, Romans 12:10 became kind of an unspoken theme among the counselors, especially the second half of the ESV translation. It became a joke among the summer staff that if we were to ever be in a burning building, we would all burn because we would be so insistent on putting each other before ourselves—we would fight to hold the door for each other and let others go first, and eventually the fire would consume us along with the building. It became almost a game to be the first to finish at meals in order to collect and clean everyone's dishes. Sometimes the game broke out into races to the dish room. One counselor even sabotaged me with honor one night by convincing my campers to let me take the first shower of the night. This was partially in response to his campers from a few weeks earlier, who had been determined to honor their counselor so much that he would be utterly unable to serve them because of how quick they were to serve him in the ways he wanted to serve.
If there was any underlying theme for the whole summer, it would have to be the theme of "[outdoing] one another in showing honor," and also that the greatest challenges bring the greatest rewards (James 1:12). The theme verses of the sessions were John 15 (abiding in Christ), Colossians 3:16 (letting the Word dwell in us richly), James 1:1 (being transformed from skeptic to willing servant through a deep personal relationship with Christ, just as James was after his encounter with the risen Savior), and James 1:27 (being found pure in the sight of God by the blood of Christ, and living in that identity as one who is unstained by sin). These themes also played an important part in my growth this summer leading into this present semester. They seem to me like themes for my own personal devotion to God though. If you were to ask me what I took away from the summer, I would probably bring up the first two themes I originally mentioned. But though I don't immediately think of the session themes, they have been key in bringing me out of the slump I found myself in last year. Going into the summer, I had my fears and insecurities because last year was a strange year for me spiritually. Since my response to the Lord's call in January 2010, Scripture has been my place of refuge and refreshment when it comes to my growth in my walk with Christ. But after spending an entire summer leading elementary and middle schoolers in the basics of TAG time (Time Alone with God), I found myself feeling comfortable with what I already knew of the Bible. Instead, my growth last year focused primarily on prayer. Ironically, as the year came to a close, I felt very uncomfortable about the fact that I had felt comfortable with my Scripture knowledge. So the start of this summer was the start of another turning point, bringing me back into a daily time of reading, in addition to a constant connection in prayer. My fear at the beginning was that, having not consistently been reading for a year, I wouldn't know what to teach my campers or how to lead them this year in comparison to last year. But another key theme of the summer was this truth: I don't have what they [the campers] need. In and of myself, I have nothing of value to offer. God pointed this out to me right away. He had a purpose for keeping me from reading the Bible like I was used to: to humble me and to make me dependent on Him in order to lead the campers into a personal knowledge of Christ. And as soon as the campers arrived, I began to notice that the Lord had blessed me beyond what I could have imagined coming into the summer by calling to mind Scripture references and memory verses I didn't even know I still remembered.
He also blessed me with fantastic co-counselors and an incredible team of fellow staff. Vinnie, who was my co-counselor for four weeks last summer, was my co again for six out of the seven weeks of camp this summer. The way that he modeled the wisdom he shared was a huge inspiration to me because he truly lives out James 1:22, not merely listening to the Word, but also doing it. His is a James 3:17 kind of wisdom. This convicted me at the beginning of the summer to seek to live out wisdom rather than share it verbally. The wisdom that comes from God comes with humility and love, and is the kind of wisdom that is displayed, not spoken. So for the summer, at least toward the beginning when it was fresh in my mind, my task was to live and do what could be done without words, and to speak only the wisdom that had to be spoken and could not be outwardly displayed. How well I actually followed through with that goal, I'm not sure, but I bring up the point now so that I can renew my prayers and efforts for such wisdom.
There's still a lot more I want to share about camp, but I'll leave it there for now. I'll have more about day-to-day life and the wins for Christ I saw this summer next time.
—————
Recap:
I don't have what they need.
"We're going to burn!" Outdoing one another in honor.
Wisdom: Doing what can be shown without words, and saying only what cannot be communicated otherwise.
This year, Romans 12:10 became kind of an unspoken theme among the counselors, especially the second half of the ESV translation. It became a joke among the summer staff that if we were to ever be in a burning building, we would all burn because we would be so insistent on putting each other before ourselves—we would fight to hold the door for each other and let others go first, and eventually the fire would consume us along with the building. It became almost a game to be the first to finish at meals in order to collect and clean everyone's dishes. Sometimes the game broke out into races to the dish room. One counselor even sabotaged me with honor one night by convincing my campers to let me take the first shower of the night. This was partially in response to his campers from a few weeks earlier, who had been determined to honor their counselor so much that he would be utterly unable to serve them because of how quick they were to serve him in the ways he wanted to serve.
If there was any underlying theme for the whole summer, it would have to be the theme of "[outdoing] one another in showing honor," and also that the greatest challenges bring the greatest rewards (James 1:12). The theme verses of the sessions were John 15 (abiding in Christ), Colossians 3:16 (letting the Word dwell in us richly), James 1:1 (being transformed from skeptic to willing servant through a deep personal relationship with Christ, just as James was after his encounter with the risen Savior), and James 1:27 (being found pure in the sight of God by the blood of Christ, and living in that identity as one who is unstained by sin). These themes also played an important part in my growth this summer leading into this present semester. They seem to me like themes for my own personal devotion to God though. If you were to ask me what I took away from the summer, I would probably bring up the first two themes I originally mentioned. But though I don't immediately think of the session themes, they have been key in bringing me out of the slump I found myself in last year. Going into the summer, I had my fears and insecurities because last year was a strange year for me spiritually. Since my response to the Lord's call in January 2010, Scripture has been my place of refuge and refreshment when it comes to my growth in my walk with Christ. But after spending an entire summer leading elementary and middle schoolers in the basics of TAG time (Time Alone with God), I found myself feeling comfortable with what I already knew of the Bible. Instead, my growth last year focused primarily on prayer. Ironically, as the year came to a close, I felt very uncomfortable about the fact that I had felt comfortable with my Scripture knowledge. So the start of this summer was the start of another turning point, bringing me back into a daily time of reading, in addition to a constant connection in prayer. My fear at the beginning was that, having not consistently been reading for a year, I wouldn't know what to teach my campers or how to lead them this year in comparison to last year. But another key theme of the summer was this truth: I don't have what they [the campers] need. In and of myself, I have nothing of value to offer. God pointed this out to me right away. He had a purpose for keeping me from reading the Bible like I was used to: to humble me and to make me dependent on Him in order to lead the campers into a personal knowledge of Christ. And as soon as the campers arrived, I began to notice that the Lord had blessed me beyond what I could have imagined coming into the summer by calling to mind Scripture references and memory verses I didn't even know I still remembered.
He also blessed me with fantastic co-counselors and an incredible team of fellow staff. Vinnie, who was my co-counselor for four weeks last summer, was my co again for six out of the seven weeks of camp this summer. The way that he modeled the wisdom he shared was a huge inspiration to me because he truly lives out James 1:22, not merely listening to the Word, but also doing it. His is a James 3:17 kind of wisdom. This convicted me at the beginning of the summer to seek to live out wisdom rather than share it verbally. The wisdom that comes from God comes with humility and love, and is the kind of wisdom that is displayed, not spoken. So for the summer, at least toward the beginning when it was fresh in my mind, my task was to live and do what could be done without words, and to speak only the wisdom that had to be spoken and could not be outwardly displayed. How well I actually followed through with that goal, I'm not sure, but I bring up the point now so that I can renew my prayers and efforts for such wisdom.
There's still a lot more I want to share about camp, but I'll leave it there for now. I'll have more about day-to-day life and the wins for Christ I saw this summer next time.
—————
Recap:
I don't have what they need.
"We're going to burn!" Outdoing one another in honor.
Wisdom: Doing what can be shown without words, and saying only what cannot be communicated otherwise.
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